Let The Confessions Begin...

Hello everyone…which probably isn’t anyone since this is the first day writing in my blog.  I’m new to this whole thing, so please be patient.  If you couldn’t tell from the title, I am in fact a YoYo Dieter.  I guess the first step when recovering from an addiction is admitting it…so here goes…

I am sure a lot of people will frown upon me for my history with dieting etc., but the point of this blog is to rectify my past.  It all started when I was 14 years old and moved to a new state, new high school, everything was new.  I was always skinny and I guess the stress from moving made me blow up like a balloon.  In reality it probably wasn’t that big of a balloon, considering I would love to be that weight again right now.  At 17 I tried the Atkins diet.  I lost a lot of weight, but it was easily gained back as soon as I started eating carbs again (I’m a carb/starch addict).  At 18 I tried Metabolic Research Center (another diet program).  You basically starve to death on this diet, so it didn’t last long.  In college I did the “eat less workout more” diet.  You eat small amounts and then spend about 3 hours a day in the gym.  Worked brilliantly, but was short lived.  Also throughout college I went on about every diet pill you can imagine and even tried the diet program L.A. Weightloss, which of course they all failed.

After college I moved to California for my career.  I moved from my family and friends and completely started over.  Being in California did not help my self esteem or my weight.  I spiraled out of control with the fast food.  I tried Nutrisystem and it worked…during the 3 months I was on it I lost 36 pounds.  The problem is I don’t like beans and a majority of their food consists of beans for protein.  The items without beans were limited, so I was stuck eating the same thing every day and eventually fell off the wagon.  After Nutrisystem I tried the HCG Protocol where you take the hcg drops.  It worked really quickly, but was so strict that I didn’t have the will power to stick to it.  All of the diets I’ve done I get really depressed because the programs are usually so strict that you are not allowed to go out to eat, or you are limited to only a salad.  When my friends would ask my out to lunch I would have to say, “No, but do you want to go running at the park”.  Needless to say the offers to hang out started to shrink.

By this time you can start to see a pattern that I go way too hardcore on a diet and then fall off the wagon and can never get back on.  I’ve decided to try Weight Watchers Online.  I realize that I need to learn how to eat REAL food in healthy combinations.  I need to train myself that it is ok to go out to eat, but you have to make good choices.  My problem has always been that I don’t know what those choices are.  It’s also cheaper then many diets if you choose the online option.  I may not lose the weight as quickly with Weight Watchers as other diets, but I feel like I will be able to be more of a real person and not such a recluse.  I am going to do a healthy work out regime instead of kill myself as usual.  This blog is to help me face my challenges instead of hide them.

MY CONFESSIONS TODAY:  I am an emotional eater which has resulted in binge eating on fast food.  My guilt leads me to lie to my family and friends and hide my food choices which lead to a downward spiral.